MediaPloyment is a training course in Rabka-Zdrój, Poland, with participants from Armenia, Belarus, Azerbaijan, Georgia, Italy, Moldova, Poland, Portugal, Spain, Turkey, Ukraine, and the UK . The main aim is to enhance understanding of how social media can be a useful tool for youth in finding employment, and to increase awareness of the dangers which come with it. The course will also raise awareness of Youth in Action opportunities for co-operation between EU and EECA countries.
Monday, October 28, 2013
Cyber Bullying And The Bully And Victim Mentality
So yesterday Lee and myself were privileged enough to take over the Cyber Bullying session. With us both growing up being raised with the mentality of a martial artist we understand the 'thinkings' of not just an attacker, but of those who let themselves become a victim.
The issue of cyber bullying is becoming a bigger and bigger problem with social media growing, sadly we're seeing more and more suicides from cyber bullying because it's becoming so easy to hide behind a computer. There's no fear of confrontation, and you can remain anonymous making it easy to become an attacker.
The more we can understand and transform fear, the more we can accomplish it. This theory applies to victims of bullying. The first question a victim of harassment might ask themselves is 'why me?'.. My goal is to teach people to understand how peoples minds work and the emotions behind the fronts, because once we understand the other people, we become less intimidated by them.
The Bully Mentality
The first question I asked the class was 'What does and animal do if it's attacked?'.. It defends itself. Defence is a natural instinct in any living being, we are built to survive.
Our main port of call when defending is attacking back, and being the one to 'throw the first punch' as such. When we think of an attacker, we can assume they must be just a bad person to want to inflict pain on another person, whether it be physical or mental. But for a human being to want to create this kind of attack on a weaker human being, they must be feeling attacked to want to defend, and when we look into the background of a bully we will find reasons behind them setting up a defence for themselves. Whether it be they're unhappy at home, they have difficult family relations or maybe they themselves are being bullied and feel that they are not strong enough to defend themselves against their own attacker. Look at the food chain, we go for the weaker animal. Why would we attack something or someone we don't think we can beat?
The Victim Mentality
You can not be a victim unless you let yourself become one. A lot of people do not realise we have this choice in life.
Being bullied can be a huge implication on someone's whole life, not just the months or years the experience it. It can change their whole way of seeing the world, the question is 'why me?' And that question can influence your the rest of your life. It's a huge confidence knock, which can have a knock on effect in the way you live.
However, I repeat, you can NOT be a victim unless you let yourself become one. You give in to being the weaker animal, and this is the same predicament the bully will have been in, but they choose to defend themselves by looking for someone susceptible to attack to make themselves feel better. It's a mind-set.
Bullies and attackers look for the lower food chain. They choose you because they know you will give them that authority they are looking for, the empowerment to help them feel that they are not the lowest species.
The sooner we understand this, the sooner we know the victim should no longer ask the question 'why me?' but the answer 'I know it is not me, it is them that are unhappy.'
This understanding would create an automatic armour around ourselves because we would know why they were choosing us.
A good lesson we learn in martial arts is how a street attacker works. So for example an attacker looking for a woman to rape. A common thought about this is that it's always the girls with the short skirts and low cut tops being the loudest and drawing attention to themselves, this is not true! An attacker will always look for the weaker victim and someone loud and confident may fight back. They want an easy target, so it will always the quietest girl that they think is the least likely to shout for help or fight back.
So this is the concept of the bullying mentality. What makes matters more complex is the ease of cyber bullying. Cyber bullying can be a lot more isolated because it's not going on where other people can see and reach out to help you. And when a victim feels victimised it's extremely hard to be brave enough to ask for help, because you feel the lowest of the chain. You don't feel you have a right.
So when we implicate this understanding to people who might be susceptible to being the sufferer of cyber bullying, they no longer feel so alone and isolated because they understand. It makes it much easier for them to reach out for help, or even reach out for help for the bully.
Another good saying I've heard within my martial arts background is 'fake it until you make it'. In this respect it means that if you don't feel confident in what you've learnt, pretend! Act confident even if inside you might not believe it. If someone attacked you physically in the street and you turned round and shouted at them and acted ready, loud and confident you would completely throw an attacker off guard. The rabbit would turn into a lion. You don't attack a lion.
I really enjoyed being able to share this with people yesterday because I don't think it's an obvious thing to think about when thinking of bullying. It's much easier to call someone a bad person.
Teaching the martial arts was also really fun and I hope people feel a bit safer and confident about themselves!
Remember position number one. We all hold our hands together in front of our face because we are all equal, we bow because we understand and respect each other.
So stand tall and hold your head high. Remember that people don't attack the lion. And even if this feels unnatural to you, just fake it!
The issue of cyber bullying is becoming a bigger and bigger problem with social media growing, sadly we're seeing more and more suicides from cyber bullying because it's becoming so easy to hide behind a computer. There's no fear of confrontation, and you can remain anonymous making it easy to become an attacker.
The more we can understand and transform fear, the more we can accomplish it. This theory applies to victims of bullying. The first question a victim of harassment might ask themselves is 'why me?'.. My goal is to teach people to understand how peoples minds work and the emotions behind the fronts, because once we understand the other people, we become less intimidated by them.
The Bully Mentality
The first question I asked the class was 'What does and animal do if it's attacked?'.. It defends itself. Defence is a natural instinct in any living being, we are built to survive.
Our main port of call when defending is attacking back, and being the one to 'throw the first punch' as such. When we think of an attacker, we can assume they must be just a bad person to want to inflict pain on another person, whether it be physical or mental. But for a human being to want to create this kind of attack on a weaker human being, they must be feeling attacked to want to defend, and when we look into the background of a bully we will find reasons behind them setting up a defence for themselves. Whether it be they're unhappy at home, they have difficult family relations or maybe they themselves are being bullied and feel that they are not strong enough to defend themselves against their own attacker. Look at the food chain, we go for the weaker animal. Why would we attack something or someone we don't think we can beat?
The Victim Mentality
You can not be a victim unless you let yourself become one. A lot of people do not realise we have this choice in life.
Being bullied can be a huge implication on someone's whole life, not just the months or years the experience it. It can change their whole way of seeing the world, the question is 'why me?' And that question can influence your the rest of your life. It's a huge confidence knock, which can have a knock on effect in the way you live.
However, I repeat, you can NOT be a victim unless you let yourself become one. You give in to being the weaker animal, and this is the same predicament the bully will have been in, but they choose to defend themselves by looking for someone susceptible to attack to make themselves feel better. It's a mind-set.
Bullies and attackers look for the lower food chain. They choose you because they know you will give them that authority they are looking for, the empowerment to help them feel that they are not the lowest species.
The sooner we understand this, the sooner we know the victim should no longer ask the question 'why me?' but the answer 'I know it is not me, it is them that are unhappy.'
This understanding would create an automatic armour around ourselves because we would know why they were choosing us.
A good lesson we learn in martial arts is how a street attacker works. So for example an attacker looking for a woman to rape. A common thought about this is that it's always the girls with the short skirts and low cut tops being the loudest and drawing attention to themselves, this is not true! An attacker will always look for the weaker victim and someone loud and confident may fight back. They want an easy target, so it will always the quietest girl that they think is the least likely to shout for help or fight back.
So this is the concept of the bullying mentality. What makes matters more complex is the ease of cyber bullying. Cyber bullying can be a lot more isolated because it's not going on where other people can see and reach out to help you. And when a victim feels victimised it's extremely hard to be brave enough to ask for help, because you feel the lowest of the chain. You don't feel you have a right.
So when we implicate this understanding to people who might be susceptible to being the sufferer of cyber bullying, they no longer feel so alone and isolated because they understand. It makes it much easier for them to reach out for help, or even reach out for help for the bully.
Another good saying I've heard within my martial arts background is 'fake it until you make it'. In this respect it means that if you don't feel confident in what you've learnt, pretend! Act confident even if inside you might not believe it. If someone attacked you physically in the street and you turned round and shouted at them and acted ready, loud and confident you would completely throw an attacker off guard. The rabbit would turn into a lion. You don't attack a lion.
I really enjoyed being able to share this with people yesterday because I don't think it's an obvious thing to think about when thinking of bullying. It's much easier to call someone a bad person.
Teaching the martial arts was also really fun and I hope people feel a bit safer and confident about themselves!
Remember position number one. We all hold our hands together in front of our face because we are all equal, we bow because we understand and respect each other.
So stand tall and hold your head high. Remember that people don't attack the lion. And even if this feels unnatural to you, just fake it!
Sunday, October 27, 2013
First Day in Rabka!
We were really excited today because it was the first day! During the day, we tried to get to know each other. We all discovered our expectations from the project, our experiences in and knowledge about social media. I can say that the integration between the participants was really good and quick. The activities ans workshops made us feel comfortable and thanks to them, we became friends easily.
Furthermore, Polish organisation team presented us the Youth in Action priorities. It was a really very good and useful for us. Thanks to this presentation, we all now know the Youth in Action Programme well and how we can benefit from it. Also, it was very good to listen to the NGOs from the different countries. It helped us to know these NGOs and gave a great opportunity to build relationship with them for future projects.
Everybody was really interested in social media and it was good to gain the most benefit from the project/ Each of us use it for both our personal and professional lives. So, we all have some experiences in this area and thanks to this project, we have found an opportunity to share them with each other.
Apart from working hard, we have also had fun. There are a lot of people from not only Europe, but also from the different parts of the world. It means that there are also a lot of different cultures/ During coffee breaks, we could get to know each other and our cultures. It is really important to build a good dialogue between cultures. Maybe that 's why Polish organisation team has called these coffee breaks as "cultural breaks".
We were really excited today because it was the first day! During the day, we tried to get to know each other. We all discovered our expectations from the project, our experiences in and knowledge about social media. I can say that the integration between the participants was really good and quick. The activities ans workshops made us feel comfortable and thanks to them, we became friends easily.
Furthermore, Polish organisation team presented us the Youth in Action priorities. It was a really very good and useful for us. Thanks to this presentation, we all now know the Youth in Action Programme well and how we can benefit from it. Also, it was very good to listen to the NGOs from the different countries. It helped us to know these NGOs and gave a great opportunity to build relationship with them for future projects.
Everybody was really interested in social media and it was good to gain the most benefit from the project/ Each of us use it for both our personal and professional lives. So, we all have some experiences in this area and thanks to this project, we have found an opportunity to share them with each other.
Apart from working hard, we have also had fun. There are a lot of people from not only Europe, but also from the different parts of the world. It means that there are also a lot of different cultures/ During coffee breaks, we could get to know each other and our cultures. It is really important to build a good dialogue between cultures. Maybe that 's why Polish organisation team has called these coffee breaks as "cultural breaks".
Our Saturday with Mediaployment!
Let's share with you a short resume of
what we did yesterday. In the morning we were very glad to meet the
special guest Kasha from Krakow, who explained to us manya
interesting things about social media, especially the examples of how
social media can help to find a job using creative videos.
After a funny game to Romanian music converting us into penguins, we continued presenting the work we've done the day before. In different teams we presented how different professions can create their CV on social media. E.g. using LinkedIn, Europass, videos, etc., and discussing what we could improve.
After lunch we got to know our personal
learning style from Anna through a questionnaire.
Then we were divided into different
groups again and do a pantomime. We were in the future in 2150 and
received two visitors from the past who tried to make us remember why
we are on the earth: not just social media interaction is what makes
us human. The outcome were four very interesting interpretations of
this situation.
After an intense day we started the
Polish night which was already explained very well before by Thea!
Thanks for this day from group 3 :-)
Blog on behalf of Lee (blogging about days 1 & 2)
Hi everybody. I'm Lee Price, here with my belated introduction! I've been battling with internet and phone problems keeping me from posting. Now I am here I can't wait to share my experiences with you.
On Wednesday 23rd, Thea and I flew in from Liverpool, England. The flight was delayed, but when we finally got up into the air I could see that Poland was very beautiful from the sky.
We arrived at Krakow airport and took the train to meet some of the team in the city centre.
My first impression was that the streets were very clean and there is also some interesting architecture here.
After meeting the team we took a bus together to Rabka. The journey took between one and two hours. By the time we arrived I could see that everyone was already becoming friends. It was dark when we left the bus so I could not see the lovely views, but I could tell that the air was very clean. Matt, one of our trainers explained that many people come to Rabka to help them heal, almost like a spa-town.
We checked into our rooms, and when everybody arrived we broke the ice with a fun name game. Now I was feeling really comfortable around my new friends, and I was excited to begin the training.
The following day we began by sharing our expectations for the week, our fears, and what we had to contribute to one and other with our knowledge and experience. It was clear that I was in a room filled with enthusiasm.
Thea and I are here with Momentum so we shared information about their past work and the upcoming training course that will be held in London, January 3rd-11th. See link below
Click here for more info about leadership course
It was so interesting to hear about the other groups and all the good work being done around Europe.
We finished the second day with a cultural fair. We shared food, drink and music from our home. It was a great night and I enjoyed connecting with everyone.
We were already beginning to learn about social media and this was made so much easier by the leadership of the team here and the passion inside the participants. In my next post I will share my Friday and Saturday with you, and more details about the training, so come back soon!
Post on behalf of Nara
Since yesterday the participants have become much closer and the ice has definitely broke, they having fun together and talking more.
The sessions are getting more useful, and much faster because of built relationships, we learnt new things like the polish night which was really useful to learn about polish culture and today we discovered that the soup we ate today was actually polish wedding soup.'
The sessions are getting more useful, and much faster because of built relationships, we learnt new things like the polish night which was really useful to learn about polish culture and today we discovered that the soup we ate today was actually polish wedding soup.'
Tagging into Trouble
Ok so our task was to write a story or article about one of the rules for using social media.
Our rule was: Always consider confidentiality when talking about people if you work in a profession with confidentiality laws.
So here is our story! :)
Thea and Nadine
Tagging into Trouble
By Nadine Rutow and Thea Hanson-Orr
Today we saw again how easy it is to make a mistake through social media when working in a profession involving confidentiality contracts. Maria S (23) was a nurse from Tameside Hospital working in the emergency department.
Maria's friend Bob M (25) had an embarrassing accident at a married lady friends house, after beginning to get intimate with her in the front room he heard a key in the front door and panicked. Abandoning his clothes, he tried to make a run for it and on the way managed to trip on a table leg, and break his nose on the arm of a chair on the way down.
During his trip to the emergency department, he saw his friend Maria S on duty, he told her his story and expressed his embarrassment to which she expressed her amusement.
On Bob's arrival home, he visited Facebook to find himself tagged in a status by Maria which read 'I saw Bob at work tonight, he somehow managed break his nose while running away from his new shag's husband! Hahaha!'.
As Maria should have known, this was in fact a breach of the Confidentiality Act and unfortunately for her she forgot that she was friends with members of the legal department at Tameside Hospital on Facebook, who felt obliged to report her to the General Medical Council for breaching a patients confidentiality through social media.
Maria has now lost her nursing licence and is unable to ever register with the GMC again, making her nursing qualification useless. It just goes to show that you should always be aware of what you are writing on social media websites, what may seem like an innocent story between friends, if seen by the wrong person could lead to huge consequences for your career and life.
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